What about an exotic blend?
Look, it tastes like the Caribbean.
Mmm.
No, no, no.
Look, look.
It's bold, like me, and handsome.
Are you trying to turn me on
or are you trying to sell me coffee?
That is a dark roast,
as in half the caffeine has been roasted out.
You want a blonde.
Mmm.
Yeah, yeah.
And you would probably have an easier time
swallowing a finer grind.
You don't have to worry yourself about my swallowing.
I know.
I'm just, uh, I'm just...
I know.
Don't worry, I won't miss our date.
The power is still on.
Hang on.
Nicole?
Just a sec.
The dance break!
I can't dance.
Oh, I'm sure you can.
No, yeah, I once saw a goat get caught
in an electric fence.
Its legs were kicking and spasming
and-and it was peeing on itself.
And while it was peeing on itself,
all I could think to myself was,
God, that goat is a much better dancer than me.
Well, guess what?
There are no goats here to show you up.
It's just me.
You're always so warm.
I thought you said you like it bold.
Too bold.
Even I have my limits.
Ha, well, I haven't seen them yet.
Oh, look, we have a visitor.
Maybe he knows if the power's on in your little district.
Hello!
Nicole, get down!
Get down, get down!
Keep your head down!
Bill, I think it's coming from that building over there.
All right, good to know.
Get behind the fucking door.
Okay.
Fuck.
Bill, Bill!
Okay, okay.
That shot came from, uh, pretty up high.
Can you, uh, look in that mirror?
Why?
Keep an eye on that building for me.
What the fuck...
Idiot!
You could have gotten shot.
And it was the middle building, sixth floor.
There's not like an ex-boyfriend
I should know about or?
Yeah, his name's Earl and he's an amazing sharpshooter.
We could die here.
Miss our date?
No way.
What was that?
Get the flashlight.
Yeah.
Is this the flashlight?
Mm-hmm.
Okay, I'm going to go on three, you ready?
Okay, yeah.
Okay.
Babe, come on.
I see you got the hint.
Yeah, we did.
Thanks.
Good job, kid.
Mm-hmm.
It sucks to shut down power in the one city that has it.
Oh, it's not the whole city,
although I did knock off the grid for eight blocks.
So, yeah, it's not nothing.
Keep it down, he's still out there.
What the hell's going on?
Some asshole is shooting at people.
No, yeah, right, I got that part.
But why is some asshole shooting people?
Guarding the city.
Trying to stay under cover ever since
the body trail started a mile back.
It's always the same, clean shot through the head.
That guy was lucky number seven.
New guys need a top-off?
Hi, I think...
Just right in the chest, here.
No.
Your loss.
About the only shit that works at this point.
I'm Beth.
Um, this is my husband, Colin.
That's my brother, John, Jeffery, and...
Ellis.
Old friends, you two, huh?
Every bit of 30 minutes.
You'd be amazed how quick you can bond
under threat of sniper fire.
Yeah, I'm, uh, I'm sorry.
You uh, you said he was guarding the city.
What is he guarding the city from?
From people like us.
This is where the big sleep started.
That's why you're here, isn't it?
That's not why you're here.
Well, we're headed to a bakery.
A bakery?
I mean it's the bakery, Dallas Patisserie.
I'm sorry.
To eat?
No, to bake.
Oh, my God, that place is amazing!
You can make anything there, raspberry sponge cake
or, or maybe a fig pie or, I don't know.
You can make a macaroon for your friend.
But me?
I'm going to make a white-chocolate,
lemon blueberry crunch cake in the greatest
goddamn kitchen in the world.
And then, then I'll be good.
Wouldn't you rather be alive?
I mean at this point we need every kicking person
that we can get.
We're at the end of the trail here.
We're about to, to figure this thing out.
I'm sorry.
You are the echo of every friend that we've had
in the last five days.
And guess what?
They're all dead.
Well, it's a good thing I'm not your friend.
Look, you've got to understand we're s...
I'm sorry.
With a sniper out there?
I'm sorry, uh...
Interrupt me again.
I dare you.
Hey, I got this.
Hi, Mr. Ellis.
Thank you so much for your offer, but Bill's right.
I mean we've watched so many people chase cures.
I'd rather chase a cronut.
Wait, what's a cronut?
It's a croissant doughnut hybrid.
Sounds really good.
Yeah.
Change of plans, cronuts first, save the world second?
Nobody's saving anything or baking anything,
for that matter, as long as that sniper is out there.
I know there's not too many people
that can take that clean a head shot.
He's got to be close.
He is close.
He's in the middle building right there, sixth story.
Hey, I was the one who spotted him.
He's in the middle building, sixth floor.
Well, then, I think it's about time we go
and introduce ourselves.
Any chance that's not our place?
I'm not complaining, makes things nice and easy.
I hate to be the one to say it but, uh,
what are the chances that they captured your doctor friend
and forced her to leave the message to alert people here?
Are we about to get fucked, Ally?
All I know, Jake, is that I didn't ask you to come here.
So if that's what ends up happening,
then just remember you fucked yourself.
Yeah, it wouldn't be the first time.
All clear, Lex neutralized.
Look, I have to go down there.
Um, you can come with me but you don't have to.
I understand.
I'll be back.
Wait, we're not exactly dressed in our Sunday best.
If they're worried about threats,
maybe we should be non-threatening.
What does that mean?
It means I have an idea.
Don't you fuckin' move, not one goddamn inch.
Keep your hands away from the weapon
and step down off the table slowly.
And I do mean slow.
Easy.
Hands up.
Can I speak?
Clearly you can.
I'm not your enemy, you know.
So those were friendly bullets.
We're all good, babe, come on up.
Getting really good at this whole human target thing.
Yeah, I think I found my true calling.
Easy there, tiger.
I don't suppose an apology would suffice?
Wouldn't hurt.
But while you're at it, you can tell us what the fuck
you're doing up here shooting at us.
I wasn't shooting at you.
I was shooting at what I thought you were.
Really.
Enlighten us.
Well, a guy in the parking lot...
You mean the man you gunned down,
the one that's laying permanently on the pavement
with his face shot off?
Yeah, that's the one, except that's not a man...
I mean not anymore, anyways.
All these psychopaths trying to stay awake
and they just go wrong.
Maybe the core was always rotten
and it just took a little end-of-the-world chaos
to dig it out, I don't know.
Psychology was never really my thing.
What was your thing, murder?
Marksmanship.
I don't know who you are, but I know you're not a friend.
So what are you?
I'm Meredith.
You know, it's nutritional no matter how you ingest it.
But, you know, milk tastes better with a straw.
And I think that has everything to do with that
it's how you start off drinking it, so.
Are you talking about a nipple?
Yeah, but, you know, you see a nipple,
a child sees nature's first straw, so.
I'm glad people like you are left to repopulate the Earth.
Yeah, life's funny.
Mark?
Yeah?
Am I hallucinating or is that family
approaching us in their underwear?
No, that's real.
Hi, we, uh, we heard your little jingle on the radio.
It's a very catchy tune,
especially the part about a cure.
I know a lot of people say that radio's dead
but I personally think it's making a huge comeback.
Um, hi.
We're, we are friends of Alexis Verdes.
Uh, she, um, she came here a couple of days ago,
maybe goes by Lex?
Yeah, the surgeon?
She's been here since Monday.
Who are these people?
Uh, I'm assuming you'd like to come in?
Yes, that would be great.
A quick question, if we'd have come in our normal clothes
would you have let us in anyway?
Yeah.
One more quick question,
do you in any way at all find us threatening?
No.
I'm going to take that as a win.
Fucking weirdos.
Guys, I'm flattered that you think I know anything
about the end of the world.
I really am.
But I was just trying to stay alive.
So you're telling me when we walk out
of this building you don't have any buddies
out there ready to gun us down?
I would be so lucky but, no, you'll see.
I don't know, like maybe we should take off, right?
Bakery's not far.
How do we know if the city's safe, Bill?
I mean people are shooting at us,
more you than me but still at us.
Yeah, but, you know, I made you a cake promise.
You don't go back on cake promises
because they're inked in icing.
I know, I...
Oh, shit.
Oh, hey, are you all right?
Yeah, I'm fine.
Hey, hey, you okay?
I, yeah, I just got a little dizzy.
All right, time for a little refresher.
Here you go, baby.
Thank you, baby.
All right.
Thank you.
Uh-huh, here you go.
Ellis?
What, come on, man.
There's like eight people left in the world
and you're going to stiff me?
There'd be more if you weren't
gunning survivors down in your spare time.
Trust me, those aren't survivors you'd want around.
God, what a sweetheart.
You are not getting another one.
I didn't ask.
Thank you.
Hey, listen, those survivors?
Did you even check the bodies?
Their shot-out faces was a bit distracting.
Understandable.
But if you would have taken even another moment
you would have noticed all of the self-mutilations,
I mean what they always do.
They cut themselves in all manners of crazy shit.
Oh, that's funny because I don't remember
Nicole and I having any mutilations.
I'm very sorry,
but you were really close to that asshole who did.
What are you doing in Dallas?
When I'm not being held at gunpoint
I tend to spend my time living here.
She's right, Corporal Meredith Baird.
There a Marine base nearby?
Reserves.
Well, what does MOS 0317 mean?
Scout Sniper.
Yeah.
Um, it's one of 37 women actually,
and full integration of other combat arms
would have happened next year.
Probably won't happen now, so.
Okay.
If you really live here, what is the best bakery in town?
Dallas Patisserie?
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay, do you guys have anymore paranoid questions?
Would you like to check my wallet
for my Russian sleeper-cell card?
I mean sleeper cell would probably be fitting right now.
But, look, I really want to live.
You want to live.
So with that established,
why don't we find a way to work together?
And why the fuck should we trust you?
I've been thinking about that and here's what I got.
Fuck!
Where'd you hide that?
You should have been more thorough.
So we're at a cool eight rounds in my little friend here,
and you've seen what I can do at 400 meters.
Imagine what I can do at four.
You know what, how about I just tell you?
I can put a hole clean through your eyeball
and turn your head into a fucking birdhouse,
which would be a real shame considering
that there aren't birds anymore.
So is there anybody here right now who doesn't
believe that I could kill you at this moment?
Anybody?
Okay, let's move on.
I want an answer as much as you do,
unless you think that I enjoyed getting back to my house
on Friday and finding my dead husband.
There's a photo of him right there.
My hometown is known for all sorts of controversial shit.
There's the Dallas Cowboys, the JFK assassination, George W.
This is the first time that anybody pegged it
as the Ground Zero of the Apocalypse.
So here's where we're at.
I could kill all of you right now,
or we can talk through this, one big happy family.
I can help you put the pieces together.
So that's my offer.
Come on.
You got a deal.
Fuck.
Not bad for a first trust exercise, you guys.
Told you it was a good idea.
Yeah, it was a fantastic idea.
Didn't get shot, did we?
You okay?
Yeah I'm fine.
Well, this is not how I pictured it happening,
but it's still good.
Dude!
Yeah.
You got my message.
It was on all the channels,
but I told them to put it on loop.
Goddamn it, Lex.
You should have told me what you were doing.
You should have told me that you were,
I don't know, leaving.
Because maybe had you thought about that you might
have realized I would have come with you.
That's why I didn't tell you, Ally,
because I knew you'd be safe in the ward
for a couple of days.
And if you hadn't arrived,
I was going to come back to Houston tomorrow.
Oh, were you?
Yeah.
But you're here.
Meanwhile, I had the luxury of convincing myself
I was going to die before ever seeing you again.
If I had known it was going to work out,
I would have brought you, but I didn't know.
I didn't know the risks so it wasn't worth it, not with you.
I'm not sorry, Ally.
Of course you're not sorry.
You're you.
You are such a stubborn bitch.
You know that?
Mm, yeah, I know.
Oh, shit.
Oh, shit!
You haven't slept.
Well, that, yeah.
Oh, you've got to come with me.
Hurry, hurry, hurry.
I'm sure they'll probably come back for us
later or something.
All of you, come on.
Chop chop.
Let's get you some fucking clothes.
Come on.
Okay, so you followed a death trail all the way to Dallas.
You guys want cake.
What about you?
Hey, you know what?
Ellis' theory is way better than mine.
Mine's just kind of crazy.
Crazier than people dying in their sleep?
Um, I followed a bird here.
What kind of bird?
A raven, I think.
What are you, some kind of ornithologist?
No, no, it's...
I'm a dungeon master.
Like kinky sex stuff?
With whips?
No, not like kinky sex stuff.
Like wizards and witches and drow elves and ravens.
Like they're magical birds.
Or at least they can be in the game.
Anyway, we were in this cafe on the second day
whenever this bird, this freaking bird,
just lands in the center of the table
like some kind of omen.
The other guys, they thought that, oh,
he just had a late night and he would drop the same
as the rest of them.
But I don't know, I had this feeling.
And so I followed the damn thing for three days
and 500 miles, and it never dropped.
I lost it whenever the sun set just outside the town.
Mm, you're right, kid.
It's a crazy story.
Yeah.
You sure that, uh, dungeon mastery isn't
bleeding into your brain a little bit?
Oh, okay.
Yeah, no, the nerdy kid can't distinguish
reality from fiction anymore.
No, thank you.
Thank you so much for that stereotype.
You know what?
I may have been a nerd before all of this, okay,
but I was cool, I was fucking cool.
And I got women, like all the fucking time, like hot women.
Okay?
In bikinis and with like tits popping out.
All right, okay?
Want to know the secret?
It's because my penis, slightly bigger than average, okay?
No, you better believe that if my penis raced another penis
it would win in a photo finish.
Plus you know what?
I'm shorter than average.
So, yeah, it's a real favorable fucking optical illusion.
Okay?
Instead of a 3D boat coming out of a book,
no, it's my penis.
So there's that.
I only said your story was crazy, kid.
I didn't say I didn't believe you.
Well, good, because I saw the goddamn bird, okay?
Okay, birdwatcher.
What about you two?
Show 'em the phone.
Dallas area code, listed the caller as SC.
They woke me in the middle of the night
right before it happened.
Didn't say much, just one thing, don't go to sleep.
Wait, you got a doomsday wakeup call?
Yeah, I guess.
I have no idea who called us or why they called us.
So we started out to find some answers.
And instead of that you found
this big-dick dungeon master.
Whoa, whoa, could I see the phone?
Yeah.
I can trace this number.
I can figure out where this call came from.
Let's see.
You gotta be fucking kidding me.
What's happening?
What?
The Internet's down.
The whole Internet?
No, not the entire Internet.
No, just Dallas.
And it was up like an hour ago.
Fuck, without Internet I can't do anything.
We're dead in the water.
No, I got this.
Oh, yeah, how?
Know anyone in Sandy Creek Nursing Home?
No.
That's just a few blocks north from here.
Well, what are we waiting for?
Let's go.
We're not getting any more rested.
It's on the way.
Plus, who doesn't love a retirement home?
Come on, come on!
Here, take these.
Dopamine doesn't keep you awake.
Why would I take this?
What, are you a doctor now?
It's to treat you for shock.
Well, I am not in shock.
I know, but you will be.
Would you, would you just tell me what is going on here?
Did you find a cure or not, Lex?
Cure is, uh, a strong word.
But we found something.
Stay here.
Okay.
Doesn't look like anybody home.
Found our phone number.
We need to find the rec room.
Let's go.
Well, that's cool.
It's a nice tattoo.
Is it like a Viking boat?
Is that like an Army thing?
What does a Viking boat have to do with the Army?
Well, the Vikings were an army
and like they were a pretty cool army.
It's just a tattoo.
Okay, I'm just saying like you have tattoos.
I have tattoos.
Okay.
Are you trying to hit on me after I told you
that my husband just died?
Not really.
Good.
Jesus.
Great, no sign of a call log here.
Yeah, well, it is a nursing home, not a prison.
Shit, sure feels like a prison.
I spy with my little eye something better
than a call log.
Recognize either of them?
No.
Well, your gentleman caller
should be appearing any moment.
Okay.
2:57.
2:58.
2:59.
That's it.
Now what?
Run it again, slower this time.
No, no, we missed something.
If this is the number, then how is that even possible?
I mean if someone here called me...
Unless it wasn't here.
But the caller ID...
Masking your phone number isn't that hard
in the post-phone book age.
Why didn't you say something?
Because I thought it was worth checking out
and because I wanted to believe
that we were on the right track.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
We're missing something.
We could, we can search the rooms again.
What the fuck is in Dallas?
Goddamn it!
Sorry if anybody was watching that.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
What the hell?
I don't see anything.
No, don't look at the phones.
Look at the monitor.
I expect the government to take a little more
than zero seconds to produce a doomsday broadcast.
I don't understand.
Wait. You're saying that...
The television signal, hell, maybe the radio too.
mean look right here, 3 am on the fucking dot.
Oh, shit.
You wanna call that a coincidence?
We came here looking for answers, right?
How about a signal that's immediate, far-reaching,
it's been active the second this whole thing started.
Meredith, is there a broadcast station nearby?
Yeah.
Actually, it's the largest one in the Southwest.
Fuck, yes.
Let's go.
Nicole?
Oh, my God, wake up, wake up, wake up!
Stand up, stand up, get her up.
You with us?
Hi.
Shit, that was a rough one.
Bill...
No, I know.
It's time to go.
You know if you carry her to the station you'll run...
We're not going to the station.
This is where we get off.
But we're onto something.
Stop, I told you the minute we met
we didn't want to chase cures, and here we are again.
I am sorry, but we are done.
Look, guys, um, we have a date.
So I can't really miss it.
Best of luck.
Where are you going?
Shit.
Excuse me?
You don't take anything to stay awake.
You gave me your shot and yet she's the one who's fading.
You guys were right to have your suspicions,
but I think they were aimed at the wrong person.
Okay, there's nothing suspicious about it.
No, it's okay I got this.
I have a condition, I'm not evil.
Uh, I just have what you might consider a really, really,
really bad case of insomnia.
Maybe half a dozen people have it in the world.
It's, uh, fatal familial insomnia.
It's physically impossible for me to fall asleep.
I was diagnosed six months ago.
I have not slept in the last three.
How is that possible?
How do some people swim in the Arctic
or run a hundred miles?
I don't know, but they do.
And it's not like I don't need sleep, I just can't.
All those symptoms you're feeling, fatigue, delirium,
just, uh, stretch it out, yeah.
It will kill me in the end, but not for another year or so.
Kind of funny when you think about it,
a week ago I was the one walking around
with a death sentence.
And now I may have the pleasure of being
the last man on Earth.
So there's that.
So basically what you're saying is you're
the fucking superhero of the sleep apocalypse?
No one ever put it to me like that before but,
sure, why not?
Okay, so why don't you stay and help us?
I am sorry, but we are all going to die at some point.
I would just rather help someone really live while I can.
But thank you, guys, for everything.
You gonna make muffins while you're there?
Yeah, what kind do you want?
Blueberry.
All right, they'll be waiting for you.
Maybe we'll, um, we'll see you around.
Let 'em go.
We got a date to make too.
You got 10 minutes and then we'll bring you out.
All right.
Hold on just a fucking second.
Let's think about this.
Okay, or you can think about how every second
we don't do it he's closer to dying,
and it might just save his life.
Jake, trust her.
I just don't think that...
Ouch.
What the hell?
It's okay, Jake, don't be a pussy.
Sam, Sam?
Sam!
Sam, wake up, Sam?
Sam!
Will you take me to a movie after?
Dinner and a movie, that sounds nice.
Yeah.
Yeah?
Told you I'd make it.
I wonder if they're open.
I don't know.
Oh, look, it's 24 hours.
Good!
After you.
Thank you.
This is a really unusual flavor.
I had no idea that chicken and chocolate
could go together.
That, my compliments to the chef.
I'm pretty sure it was your concoction.
Oh, yeah.
I think I've found my true calling.
Good.
Ah, you can have mine.
Yeah, I'm good, really good.
I forgot to tell you, when the afternoon papers come out
you're going to be famous.
How come?
Someone's sitting there.
Really?
Yeah, thanks.
Thank you.
Do you know what's funny?
No.
Projector still works.
Oh, you don't say.
That's pretty good, right?
The butter went bad so...
Oh.
We have to eat around it.
Yeah, I'll live.
You know you will.
Thank you.
How do you like that?
This has been the best worst week of my life.
I don't even know your last name.
Oh. You don't, you don't want to know my, no.
Oh, I do.
Oh, it's Beavers.
Oh!
Bill Beavers, Bill Beavers.
Bill Beavers?
God, that's terrible!
It's awful, I'm so terrible.
Oh, man!
I'm sorry.
Love that.
What are you going to do?
I don't know.
I will remember this.
I'm going to remember you.
You're always so warm.
It's my superpower.
Hmm, you have a lot of superpowers.
Goodnight, Bill Beavers.
Goodnight, Nicole.